Secrets
by gleefan13
Summary: Callie might have told Jude that they didn't have to keep secrets anymore, she might have even meant it, but she certainly had not meant for him to proceed to reveal every terrible thing that had ever been done to her. Post 1x16.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Here is a post 1x16 oneshot...just a little something I couldn't get out of my head...**

xxxxxx

_Callie might have told Jude that they didn't have to keep secrets anymore, she might have even meant it, but she certainly had not meant for him to proceed to reveal every terrible thing that had ever been done to her._

xxxxxx

The Sunday after Jude's birthday, the Foster's, with the exception of Brandon, were having lunch together. It was nothing special, just soup, from a can nonetheless, but Jude didn't think it really mattered what they were eating, the fact that they were eating together at all was the part that he liked. It was one of those things that real families did and this was his real family now.

He was sitting beside Callie and at the thought of family he couldn't help but look over at her. Her words from the day of his birthday rang through his head. _Well, we don't have to keep secrets anymore, we have a family now. _Since coming back home, Callie had been trying so hard, he could tell. Yet, still, he doubted she would ever actually reveal any of her secrets. He doubted she even knew how to start. And his secrets, well, they were really just hers.

Feeling his eyes on her Callie looked over at Jude. "What kid?" She asked softly, smiling at him.

Jude just shrugged, smiling easily back at her, "nothing."

Unbothered by Jude's non-answer Callie smiled wider at him, nudging his shoulder before picking up her spoon and taking a small bite of her soup.

Sitting across the table from her, Jesus picked his spoon up too, but, instead of using it to eat with, he drummed it against the table, looking around before asking, "We got any crackers?"

Stef reached over and stilled his hand. "Tell you what, you quit beating the poor table and I'll find you some."

Jesus shrugged sheepishly, grinning at his mother. "Oops."

Stef laughed as she got up and found a box of Ritz crackers, setting them down in front of Jesus before taking her seat again.

Jesus proceeded to dump half the box of crackers into his bowl, crumbling them up so that his soup no longer resembled soup but just mushy crackers.

As he reached his hand into the box again, Stef raised one eyebrow at him, "Hey bud, maybe you want to share those?"

Jesus shrugged, slowly withdrawing his hand from the box. "Sure." He moved to pass the box to Callie but she shook her head nearly imperceptibly at him.

"Callie doesn't like crackers," Jude announced loudly from beside her.

At those words, Callie glanced inquisitively over at Jude, but he was just eating his soup casually, as if what he'd just said was no big deal. Callie glanced around the table but no one else seemed even remotely bothered by what Jude had just said, well except for Jesus.

"Really?" Jesus eyes widened as he gave Callie a look that made it clear that he thought that was one of the craziest things that he'd ever heard. After a moment though he seemed to get over the horror that someone could not like crackers, shrugging before he grinned at her, his mouth full of soup, "Oh well, more for me then."

"Jesus, please don't talk with your mouth full," Lena immediately admonished her son, although it was half-hearted and mostly out of habit.

"Gross," Marianna scrunched up her nose in disgust at her brother.

"What?" Jesus just shrugged again, as if he had no clue what they were talking about.

Stef couldn't hold back her laughter any longer then. There certainly was never a lack of entertainment in this household.

When Marianna had finally un-scrunched her nose and everyone had resumed eating, Jude glanced around the table carefully, trying to pick the right moment to ask, "Don't you want to know why Callie doesn't like crackers?"

Callie's eyes immediately widened. "Jude…" his name came out in a hushed whisper, as a plea to not say anything further.

"Why, sweets?" Stef asked casually, glancing up from her soup, not having caught on to Callie's desperate attempt to stop anymore words from leaving Jude's mouth.

"Jude, don't…" Callie was on the verge of panic now, her voice rising.

"You said we didn't have to keep secrets anymore, Callie," Jude reminded her, his eyes searching hers, as if he was just waiting for her to re-neg on what she'd told him previously.

Suddenly realizing that whatever was going on was more serious than just sibling's teasing each other, everyone in the room stilled.

"I…." Callie couldn't deny that she'd told him that they didn't have to keep secrets anymore but this was not at all what she'd meant. "Please…" she was begging even though her voice was already conveying defeat, somehow knowing that there was no stopping him now.

Stef set her spoon down and glanced over at Lena, wondering if they should stop Jude from revealing whatever it was that Callie clearly didn't want them to know. Though, before she had time to make a decision, let alone act, Jude was already speaking.

Jude ignored Callie's plea, taking a breath before revealing, "Callie hasn't liked crackers since one of our foster fathers forced her to eat them until she puked."

Everyone at the table was frowning then.

"Somebody did _what_?" Marianna's words were laced with a mixture of horror and confusion.

"Callie?" Lena asked softly, her concerned eyes on the girl who was staring down at the table as if she was trying to burn a hole through it. When that elicited no response she tried another name. "Jude?"

Jude was looking at Callie, willing her to look over at him, but it was fruitless. When Lena called his name he slowly looked away from his sister and around the table at his family. They all looked appropriately horrified and maybe just a bit confused. He was suddenly second guessing his decision but it was too late to take it back now. There was really nothing to do but finish the story. "It was a punishment…for taking the box of crackers out of the pantry," he explained, his words quiet as he glanced nervously over at Callie for her reaction. He could still picture the tears involuntarily rolling down twelve year old Callie's cheeks as she'd been sick all over the kitchen floor. It had been his fault, just like almost every bad thing that had ever happened to her, he knew that. She had been hurt so many times protecting him. She thought he didn't know the things she'd done for him, but he did.

At Jude's latest words, Callie couldn't take it anymore. She was up and walking quickly out of the room before anyone could stop her.

"Callie…" Jude called after her, getting up too, intent on following her.

"Wait, sweets," Stef stopped him, standing up and putting her hand on his shoulder, squeezing reassuringly.

"But I need to explain to her why…" Jude's shoulders drooped and he didn't really finish his thought. He had been so sure that revealing this secret, one of many, was the right thing to do but now he worried that all he'd done was push Callie away.

"I know sweets but I think she just needs a minute," Stef murmured softly. "Let me go talk to her first, okay?"

Jude sighed, wanting to protest, but nodding resignedly instead.

xxxxxx

Stef found Callie in the entranceway, she had one hand on the door and her head resting against the door frame, her eyes were closed. "Callie?" Stef called her name softly, not wanting to startle her.

Callie didn't open her eyes or move but she began to mumble, "I wasn't running, I wasn't running…"

"I can see that," Stef answered, using her most reassuring tone of voice, as she walked closer to Callie. She carefully placed her hand on the Callie's back, rubbing it gently as she murmured, "Why don't we go sit on the couch, huh?"

Callie tensed and Stef could feel her stop breathing momentarily. When she finally did let the breath she was holding out, she blinked her eyes open, nodding slightly as she pulled back from the door.

Stef wrapped her arm around Callie's shoulders, pulling her close as she led the way to the living room couch. Even once they were sitting she didn't un-wrap her arm from around Callie. Reaching up with her other hand, she smoothed Callie's hair. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Callie closed her eyes, taking several deep breaths before whispering, "I don't know."

"Okay," Stef just nodded, rubbing Callie's shoulder. "Whatever you want. When you decide, you let me know."

Minutes passed and just when Stef was convinced that Callie wasn't going to tell her anything, the girl opened her mouth.

"Jude was hungry. We…umm…we hadn't eaten in a while. Uhh…a day or two, I think." It hadn't been the only foster home where they hadn't been fed well but it was the only one where they had gone days without _any_ food at all. In the others, she'd been able to move food from her plate onto Jude's when no one was looking so that he didn't have to go to bed every night with a rumbling stomach, but in this home she hadn't had that luxury. She'd had no real way to protect him there. "So I…I broke the rules…I stole a box of crackers from the pantry…"Callie closed her eyes then, swallowing thickly.

Stef struggled with whether she should say something or wait for Callie to finish, settling for squeezing Callie's shoulder reassuringly again. What she really wanted to do was throw something or maybe scream. _Her poor babies_. She'd known they hadn't had it easy but these details horrified her, made her blood boil in anger on their behalf.

Callie opened her eyes, they settled on a spot on the wall as the memory flooded through her brain. Her next words came out in complete monotone, as she recounted the events as if she were there, not here. "I was half way up the stairs on the way to Jude's room when our foster father caught me. He grabbed the box and my arm, dragged me to the kitchen. He screamed for Jude…to make him come watch." She took a breath. "Eating the crackers was okay at first. I was pretty hungry. But then…he wouldn't let me stop. I wanted to stop. My mouth was so dry…I could barely swallow. And my stomach, it ached so badly." She shuddered involuntarily. "I knew I was going to be sick. I tried to stop it… but I couldn't…" She remembered how after she'd thrown up on the floor her foster father had pushed her face into the mess, screaming that he hoped she'd learned her lesson. He'd left her in the kitchen after that, saying that if the mess wasn't cleaned up by the time he came back that there would be real hell to pay.

Stef wasn't sure Callie even realized she was talking, she looked so lost, and it worried her almost as much as the actual words leaving Callie's mouth bothered her. When Callie's words seemed to have stopped, she tried to get her attention, calling out, "Callie, love."

It took a moment but eventually Callie blinked slowly, once, twice, a third time, before she turned her head so that she was looking at Stef. "I'm sorry."

"Oh, baby, oh no, don't be sorry." Stef's heart was breaking watching the sadness in the girl's eyes. She pulled Callie even closer, wrapping her other arm around her as well and hugging her as fiercely as she could. She was relieved when she felt Callie's hands clinging at her back, the proof that Callie was present, here with her.

She pulled back eventually, reaching up and tucking a piece of Callie's hair behind her ear, running her hand over her cheek comfortingly. "You have nothing to be sorry about, I was just worried, love, you didn't really seem like you were here."

Callie searched Stef's face, for what, she wasn't sure. Disgust, maybe? All she saw though was what she was pretty sure was love. She shrugged, looking away.

"Baby, please don't do that, please look at me," Stef sighed.

Callie turned her head slowly back to Stef but she didn't really meet her eyes.

Stef hooked her hand under Callie's chin and tilted her head up. "There, that's better," she offered Callie a small reassuring smile. "Now you listen to me. I wish that I could make all the bad things that happened to you just go away. I wish so badly that they'd never happened in the first place. Those things make me angry, and they make me sad. But here's the thing you have to understand, love…" she watched Callie carefully, waiting till she was sure that the girl was really listening, "…nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing, you could say to me about those things will ever, ever, make me love you any less. I want to hear anything you want to tell me. Lena and I, we are here to listen any time you want to talk about anything. And, honestly sweetheart, selfishly, I hope that you will trust me enough to tell me everything someday. You deserve so much better than what you've gotten in life so far, Callie. So much better. Do you understand?" She held her breath while she waited for Callie's reaction.

Callie was a bit stunned. It wasn't that she didn't know that Stef loved her, she knew, she'd been told more than once, it was just that the thought of Stef wanting to know about the things that had happened in her previous foster homes was somehow startling. In her mind, Stef and Lena and the rest of the Fosters' were bright and shiny, everything else, everything before them, was dark and dull. Callie didn't want to contaminate the bright and shiny with the dark and dull.

When Callie said nothing, Stef tried again. "Love?"

The old Callie would have shrugged and turned away but she was trying hard not to be the old Callie, so, she nodded her head ever so slightly at Stef. Yes, she understood.

"Good," Stef smiled as she pulled Callie into another tight hug.

"Stef…"Callie mumbled into her shoulder.

"Yes love?" Stef asked, pulling back and searching Callie's face.

"I…couldn't breathe," Callie laughed.

"Oops," Stef laughed too. She was still laughing when Jude came tumbling into the room moments later, Lena behind him.

"I couldn't keep him in the kitchen any longer," Lena apologized.

"It's okay," Stef shrugged, moving over away from Callie to make room on the couch.

Jude approached but stopped timidly just shy of the couch. "Callie?" He asked softly, his words full of remorse.

"Hey buddy," she smiled gently at him, patting the seat now available beside her on the couch. "Come sit down."

He hesitated only a second before taking the offered seat, sighing in relief as her arms slid around him, pulling him close to her. _She wasn't mad._

"Do you want us to leave you?" Stef asked, motioning to Lena who had perched beside her on the armrest of the couch.

Jude could tell that the question was more directed at Callie than at him so he let her answer.

Callie just shook her head easily, "no, stay."

Jude let Callie hold him for a while, soaking up the warmth and love but eventually he figured that he needed to apologize, to explain to her. Before he could say anything though, Callie was talking.

"I'm sorry I freaked out baby," Callie murmured, running her hand through his hair.

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything," Jude replied immediately.

Callie couldn't deny that she wished he hadn't brought it up. "Why did you?" She asked quietly, wanting to understand.

"You said we didn't have to keep secrets anymore," he repeated his words from before.

"Right…" Callie replied hesitantly, feeling like he was waiting for her to say something.

"You said we didn't have to keep secrets anymore but you never share any of yours," he finished, turning his head so that he was looking her right in the eye. "You never say anything about the bad stuff that happened to you. Doesn't it bother you?" His next words were quieter. "It bothers me."

Callie sighed, "Oh Jude..." She pulled him even closer, smoothing his hair and kissing the top of his head. "I just try to forget that stuff happened," she admitted to him.

"But it did," Jude whispered.

She glanced quickly over at Stef and Lena, who for their part were sitting quietly, hands clasped tightly together, listening intently. She turned her attention back to Jude, running her hand through his hair one more time. "It did," she confirmed, her whisper mimicking his.

They sat in silence a couple of moments longer before Callie shifted, turning Jude so that they were facing each other. "Sometimes I forget that you were there too buddy." She'd tried so hard to give him a normal childhood, to shield him from all the bad things going on around him, it just hadn't been possible though, not really. "I'm sorry, okay? I don't want you to think that you can't talk about that stuff."

Jude nodded slowly, accepting the apology even though she didn't really need to give him one. She had been the best thing, sometimes the only good thing, in his life for a lot of years. "But what about you?"

Callie glanced at Stef then and, as Stef smiled encouragingly at her, the woman's words from earlier resonated through her brain. "I'll try my best, okay?" She offered Jude. She could tell that he was sceptical though, so she nudged him, smiling ever so slightly, "And if you don't think I'm trying hard enough, you can step in and help me out. Deal?" It was a scary deal to offer because she knew that he would hold her to it. It meant that there would be no backing down. It meant that whether she really wanted them to or not, all those things that kept her up at night, that gave her nightmares, would eventually come to light.

"Deal," Jude nodded resolutely, a real smile lighting up his face then. "Thanks Callie," he whispered, hoping to convey how much her willingness to try meant to him.

"For you, baby, anything," Callie responded softly. And that really was the truth, for him she would do anything. It had been the mantra she lived her life by for so long. She might be trying to change some things about herself, but she wasn't about to change that one.

Happy with the response, Jude rested his head on Callie shoulder, asking lazily, "Now what?"

Lena was the one who answered for Callie, declaring, "Now I think it's about time you let us give out some hugs. What do you think Stef?"

Stef grinned, waggling her eyebrows, "I think you have the best ideas."

Jude giggled as Stef and Lena moved closer, wrapping him and Callie up, until they became nothing more than a tangle of arms and whispered I love yous.

Callie still had a lot more secrets left to tell but Jude figured that one was good enough for today.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:**** Well, first I just want to say thanks for all of the reviews I've received, they are always very much appreciated. :) Several people asked if there was going to be a sequel or if I was going to turn this into a series. I was actually very hesitant to write a second part because I was worried about how I could realistically play out a second "secret" reveal. But the more I thought about it (and with some extra encouragement from _Deluded Visions_ and _BoneyCastle237) _**** I came up with something that I felt could work...although, if I'm being truthful, I'm still a bit hesitant to post this...so let me know what you think...**

xxxxxx

The night of Jude's kitchen cracker revelation, after the lights were turned out and Callie had climbed into her bed and under the covers and closed her eyes, Mariana whispered across the room, "Callie?"

"Mmm…" Callie mumbled, not opening her eyes.

"Are you asleep?" Mariana asked, still whispering, although the volume of her voice rising slightly.

"No, I'm not sleeping," Callie couldn't keep the amusement out of her voice – she'd literally just gotten into bed, if she'd managed to fall asleep that quickly it would have been some kind of miracle.

Mariana turned her head so that she was looking over in the direction of Callie's bed. "What Jude said today…in the kitchen…what happened to you…that sucks."

Callie blinked her eyes open, staring up at the ceiling that she couldn't quite see because her eyes hadn't adjusted to the dark yet. "Ya…" she agreed easily enough without offering anything further.

"I'm sorry," Mariana murmured, her feelings about the whole thing evident as her voice conveyed nothing but sincerity.

Callie wanted to say that it was fine, that it was no big deal – the word equivalent of a shrug that wouldn't be seen in the dark – and if Mariana had said those same words to her even just this morning, she probably would have done just that, but now she hesitated. The truth was that it_ wasn't_ okay and she knew it and Mariana knew it, so there was really no sense lying. She swallowed thickly, continuing to stare up at the ceiling, finally offering a single word response, "Thanks." It might have only been a single word but her voice conveyed sincerity too.

Mariana was silent for several moments after that and it wasn't until Callie was actually almost sleeping that she spoke again, the words that were really on her mind. "Were they _all_ terrible?"

"Huh?" Callie squinted over in Mariana's direction trying to figure out what she was asking.

"Your foster homes, were they all terrible?" Mariana clarified quietly, almost shyly. Mariana didn't remember all that much from before she and Jesus had come to live with the Fosters. All she really remembered was being sad, and afraid, most of the time. And Jesus, she remembered Jesus. He'd been her rock, her safety blanket, her sunshine, her everything. But Callie hadn't had a Jesus. Sure she'd had Jude, and Mariana knew that Jude made Callie happy, but it wasn't the same thing, not really. Callie was Jude's Jesus but, maybe because of their age difference, it didn't really work the other way around. Mariana had seen the way Callie acted around Jude enough to know that sometimes she seemed more like his mother than his sister. She wondered what that was like, feeling responsible for someone else's safety. She wondered how she would have managed in the foster system if she hadn't had Jesus or, worse, if her moms hadn't come along.

Callie's eyes settled on the ceiling again, she could see it a bit better now that her eyes had adjusted to the dark. At face value it seemed like a straight forward question but for Callie it wasn't. She thought about it awhile before eventually she answered decisively, "No." It wasn't even a lie, they _hadn't _all been terrible – not in the way she was sure that Mariana meant anyway. They hadn't all starved her, they hadn't all beat her. Jude had even been happy, or close enough to happy, in a few of them. They hadn't _all _been terrible, they just hadn't been all that good either. Not everyone had hurt her physically but no one had bothered to try to love her either and sometimes she thought that was just as bad as physical pain, maybe worse.

Mariana made a noise that indicated that she'd heard Callie's answer, nodding her head even though Callie wasn't even looking in her direction. She was satisfied enough with that one word. She really had just wanted to know the answer. Callie was going to be her sister, officially, and it seemed like the kind of thing you should know about your sibling. She didn't need Callie to explain anything else to her.

The room fell silent after that for several minutes before Mariana called out again, "Callie?"

"Mmhm…" Callie mumbled sleepily, wondering what Mariana wanted now.

"Good night," Mariana offered, her voice carrying across the room.

Callie couldn't help the smile that came to her face. "Good night Mariana," she called back softly.

xxxxxx

Despite the deal that she had made with Jude, more than two weeks passed without Callie revealing a single thing. It wasn't even just that the prospect of purposely revealing anything about her past foster homes felt so unnatural that it made her palms sweat and her heart beat in a strange rhythm, it was that there just weren't that many opportunities to slide the kind of secrets Jude meant for her to reveal into conversation. In between requests to pass the cereal, she couldn't really fathom mentioning things like how one of her foster father's had frequently used his belt on her, or how she had purposely gotten into a fist fight with one of her older foster bother's so that they would get kicked out of a home where their foster mother had repeatedly called Jude stupid, or how in one of the homes they'd been placed in her foster father had twisted her arm so hard that it had snapped in two places. Although, she supposed, she didn't actually have to reveal that last one. After all, it probably didn't count as a secret if everyone already knew about it. She knew that Stef and Lena had been shown her file and the broken arm was definitely in her file. It was one of two foster homes that Bill had had to forcefully remove her and Jude from – CPS could ignore a lot of things but a report from an emergency room doctor that clearly indicated child abuse was not one of them. The other thing that CPS couldn't ignore was when they'd showed up for a home visit and found that an eleven year old and a seven year old had been left all alone for more than twenty four hours.

For his part, in those weeks, Jude hadn't said anything either, to Callie, or to anyone else. His trepidation was less about a lack of opportunity to speak up and more about his fear of Callie's reaction. Sure she'd said he could talk about whatever he wanted but he could still picture the way her eyes had widened in panic and how she'd fled the room the last time he'd spoken up. He didn't want to upset her again, didn't want to be the cause of that panicked look he'd witnessed many times in many situations. He was determined to wait and see what she would do. He was confident that eventually she would say something. They'd made a deal and Callie never broke her promises to him. Sometimes it just took her some time to figure things out.

xxxxxx

Early one evening when Jesus was at a wrestling practice and Lena was at the school hosting an open house for prospective students, the remaining Fosters', save for Brandon who was still at his father's, gathered in the living room to watch a movie. They let Jude pick the movie and, after gentle encouragement from Callie to hurry up when he'd been staring at the shelf full of DVD's for more ten minutes, he picked out _Dirty Dancing_.

An hour and forty minutes later, as the movie credits rolled, Stef glanced over at Jude, craning her head around Callie who was sitting between them on the couch. "So what did you think love?"

Jude titled his head thoughtfully, "It was good…" he grinned slowly before adding, "I just didn't understand why they were wearing bathing suits to practice dance in. Or why the bathing suits had belts."

Callie, Stef and Mariana all laughed simultaneously.

Callie reached over and ruffled Jude's hair and shoved his arm playfully. "You're such a goof, kid."

"No way, Jude's right," Mariana declared from the chair she was sitting in. "The eighties were _so_ weird."

"Hey now, Miss Thing. I'll have you know that the eighties were fabulous." Stef feigned offense at Mariana's words.

"_Please_ tell me you didn't have the ridiculously poufy hair with the crazy bangs," Mariana declared, eyeing her mother as if she were terrified to hear what she might answer.

"I'm sorry darling, I can do no such thing," Stef grinned teasingly. "My best girl friend and I just happened to have matching bangs. We were _so_ cool."

Mariana groaned covering her face with her hands. When she uncovered her face, it was to grin cheekily at her mother. "You and your best _girlfriend_?" She waggled her eyebrows.

Stef narrowed her eyes playfully, "She was a girl and she was_ just _my friend," she tossed a pillow in Mariana's direction. "I'll have you know missy, I spent the eighties firmly stuck in the closet. No girlfriends for me. No boyfriends either, actually. Come to think of it…I think you should all take a page from my book…just don't date at all in high school." She glanced around at her children, nodding her head encouragingly, her eyes wide, as if she actually thought that that was an excellent idea.

"Okay, whatever," Mariana just rolled her eyes at her mother, which made Jude laugh.

Callie didn't laugh though. From beside her, Stef could feel Callie shift, seemingly uncomfortably, and, when Jude's laughter died, the girl asked, "Why do they call it that? Being stuck in the closet?"

Stef scrunched up her forehead in thought as she looked over at Callie, she'd never really thought about it before. Eventually she gave up, "I honestly have no clue."

"Was it terrible? Is that why?" Callie responded quickly, her heart hammering in her chest.

If their arms hadn't been touching, Stef probably wouldn't have noticed the way Callie shuddered at the word terrible. It was nearly imperceptible and she almost thought that she'd imagined it but the way Jude had turned his head sharply to look over at his sister with wide eyes convinced her that she hadn't. With a sense of foreboding, Stef answered the question hesitantly, "Well…it wasn't exactly the greatest feeling. So…maybe?"

Callie blinked slowly from beside her. She could feel everyone's eyes on her as she cast hers downwards towards the floor. Worse than everyone's eyes though, she could feel Jude's nervous anticipation from beside her. He knew what was coming next and, even though she suddenly wished she hadn't started this conversation, she didn't want to disappoint him by not following through. They'd made a deal. She swallowed thickly, continuing to stare hard at the floor, her words coming out mumbled. "_Actually_ being locked in a closet is the worst." She closed her eyes remembering the darkness, the way the small ray of light would flicker under the crack in the door, remembering how cramped it had been in there, how the walls had always felt like they were moving closer and closer together.

Mariana gulped loudly, Jude bit his lip, and Stef stilled.

"Sweets…" Stef watched the girl carefully, wishing she could read her mind for just one second. She hesitated, glancing momentarily over at Jude, whose eyes didn't leave his sister for even a second – he was staring so intently at her that Stef thought that maybe he was trying to communicate telepathically. Stef took a deep breath, her gaze back on Callie, "Are you saying…" she hesitated again briefly but only long enough for her next words to come out strong, "…did somebody lock you in a closet?"

Seconds that felt like minutes passed in silence and then, slowly, Callie raised her head. She glanced at Jude and saw his nod of encouragement – exactly what she needed to speak her next words. She turned her head so that she was looking at Stef when she said, "Yes. One of my foster mother's." Although the actual words were quiet, her tone wasn't hesitant at all, it was deliberate.

Stef's heart sank. She'd known what the answer was going to be even before she'd asked the question, she could sense it, but the actual words still broke her heart. She supposed she should be happy that Callie was sharing voluntarily – she _was_ happy that Callie was sharing voluntarily – she just wished for the millionth time that Callie had no secrets worth sharing. She wished so badly that she could take all of this girl's pain away, erase it, make it so that it had never even occurred in the first place.

"Why?" Mariana couldn't keep the horrified question from leaving her lips at Callie's revelation.

Stef held her breath waiting to see how Callie would respond, hoping that the question wouldn't be too much for her to handle. That she wouldn't just get up and leave the room.

Callie had no intentions of leaving the room though, and not just because Jude had taken a hold of her hand, grasping it firmly within his own and rooting her in place. She bit her lip, tilted her head and actually looked over at Mariana before she answered, simply, "As punishment….for _everything_." She sighed, glancing at Jude then, the tone of her voice changing as she imitated her former foster mother. "_These dishes aren't clean enough, you missed a spot when you were dusting, you're looking at me funny, you're breathing too loudly..._"

Jude knew Callie was, at least partly, trying to be funny but he couldn't help but shudder, remembering exactly what it had been like to live in that house. For some reason their foster mother hadn't been able to stand Callie from the moment they'd walked through the door. She'd been almost nice to him but she was never anything but mean to Callie and he'd hated her for it. She'd shoved Callie in that closet, propping a chair under the door so that she couldn't get out, more times than Jude could count and for reasons that hadn't made any sense to him at all – she actually _had_ once punished Callie for 'looking at her funny'. More than once Callie had been forced to spend the entire night in that closet. She'd never said anything when she was finally allowed to come out but he'd been able to tell sometimes that she'd been crying while she was in there. He'd been so glad when they'd been moved away from that woman. "She was terrible," he murmured his sentiments about their former foster mother, his words directed solely at Callie, as if no one else was even in the room.

"She was," Callie agreed softly, reaching over and running her hands through Jude's hair, smoothing it out before kissing the top of his head.

"She sounds like the wicked witch of the damn west," Mariana mumbled, reminding Callie and Jude that they weren't alone as they both looked over at her.

"Mariana…" Stef warned half-heartedly.

"What?" Mariana replied unapologetically. "What would _you _call her?"

The response that popped into Stef's head was a word that rhymed with witch but she didn't offer that out loud, instead she shrugged one shoulder at Mariana. Reaching for Callie's free hand, she squeezed it as she said, "I think terrible probably sounds about right."

"_Really_ terrible," Jude corrected, dropping his head onto Callie's shoulder.

"Mmhmm…" Callie nodded her head, acknowledging both of their words but offering nothing new, biting her bottom lip instead. She didn't have much else to say about that woman or about what had happened. There probably wasn't actually a word that could describe how terrible that woman had been or how terrible being in that closet had made Callie feel but she didn't really want to talk about it anymore. Not now, anyway, maybe not ever.

Even though there were so many things that Stef wanted to say and so many things she wanted to ask – like where she could find this woman so that she could lock_ her _in a closet –she could sense that Callie, who was looking at the floor again, wanted the conversation to end. Stef knew that freely offering information about a past foster home had been a big step for Callie and she didn't want to discourage her from doing it in the future by making her uncomfortable now. So, instead of the millions of questions she wanted to ask, she asked, "So…should we get dinner ready?" Her tone was light, as she effectively changed the subject, "Mama and Jesus should be home soon."

Callie immediately turned her gaze away from the floor, her eyes searching Stef's only a moment before she nodded slowly, a small smile forming at the realization that Stef had someone understood that she didn't want to talk anymore, "We should."

Stef just smiled easily at Callie before she looked at Jude and Mariana. "Great, you can all help."

Mariana groaned, "Do I have to?" She didn't sound too bothered by the prospect though.

"Yes you do," Stef confirmed.

Jude laughed at the exchange as he picked his head up off of Callie's shoulder and let go of her hand, getting ready to head for kitchen.

Stef laughed too, casually reaching over and grabbing the back of Callie's head, pulling her head closer so that she could plant a lingering kiss on the side of her temple, conveying all of her love with the simple action.

Callie closed her eyes, soaking up all of the love that Stef was offering, and as Stef started to pull back she murmured, "Thanks," so softly that no one but Stef heard her.

"Anytime sweet girl," Stef whispered back just as softly, before getting up off of the couch and offering her hand to help first Callie and then Jude up as well.

Wrapping one arm around Callie and the other around Jude, Stef led the way to the kitchen, sneaking a few more temple kisses in along the way.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Okay...so this is a bit different than the previous two parts and I'm kinda nervous about it. I hope Jesus and Brandon aren't too out of character...or Callie either, for that matter. I'm also not sure how realistic this whole thing is but after trying unsuccessful to write something different, I decided to forget about it and just got with it...**

xxxxxx

The night that Callie told Stef about the foster mother who had repeatedly locked her in a closet, after dinner was done, the dishes were washed, homework had been checked, and all of the kids were tucked safely in their beds, Lena came into their bedroom to find Stef lying flat on her back, arms crossed and resting over eyes.

Lena watched her wife a long moment before she spoke. "Are you going to tell me what happened today?"

"Why do you think something happened?" Stef mumbled, not pulling her arms back from over her eyes.

"Well, for starters, the way you're lying there right now," Lena answered.

"I'm tired," Stef defended but, as if to prove a point, she removed her arms from over her eyes, flinching at the brightness of the light in the room.

"Right," Lena shook her head, clearly indicating that she didn't believe Stef one bit. She moved over to her side of the bed and started removing decorative pillows. "And what about the way you couldn't keep your hands off of Callie all night?"

Stef leaned up on her elbow then, shooting Lena a weird look.

At the look, Lena re-ran her last words through her head, realizing that they sounded vaguely inappropriate. "You know what I meant." She shook her head at her wife, tossing a pillow half-heartedly at her, which Stef just caught and proceeded to use to lean against as Lena re-worded her previous statement. "At dinner you kept reaching over to touch her hand, or to run your hand through her hair, and I think you must have kissed or hugged her a dozen times between dinner and bedtime."

"Can't I show my kids affection?" Stef frowned.

Lena sighed, "Of course you can. You _do_, all the time. It's one of the things I love the most about you." She got up onto the bed then, climbing far enough over so that she could quickly peck Stef on the lips before pulling back. "But, come on Stef, it was a lot even for you. And don't even get me started on the way you were scrubbing that poor pot after dinner. I thought you were trying to scrub a hole right through the bottom of it."

It was Stef's turn to sigh, as she sat up, preparing herself for what she had to say next – there had never been any doubt in her mind that she would share with Lena what Callie had told her, she'd just been stalling. She knew that it would break Lena's heart the same way it had broken hers, only probably worse because Lena seemed to feel everything more, or at least differently. "Lena…Callie told me earlier that one of her foster mother's used to lock her in a closet."

Lena's eyes widened immediately, a mixture of both horror and sorrow filling her eyes. "No." She didn't want to believe it, it was too horrible to imagine her sweet Callie locked in a closet, it hurt her heart far too much.

Stef reached for Lena's free hand squeezing it once before rubbing the back of it soothingly. She knew that Lena didn't _actually_ not believe her. "She didn't say much, just that it was a punishment for everything. The way she was talking…I don't think the things that classified as punishable offenses were too logical."

"Logical? How could locking a child in a closet _ever_ be logical?" Lena's voice was quiet and filled with sorrow but there was a hint of anger there too.

"It couldn't," Stef immediately agreed, her eyes locked with Lena's for several moments before they hardened considerably. "I would like nothing more than to find this woman and…" she didn't finish her thought, instead grabbing a fistful of the covers in a tightly clenched hand.

Lena shook her head, "And get arrested? Because that would be _really_ helpful. I always wanted to be a single parent." The truth was, she was angry too, but encouraging Stef would do no good.

Stef couldn't help the small laugh that escaped her lips.

Lena shook her head again but smiled over at her wife. The smile was short lived as a thought crossed her mind, though. "What about Jude?"

Stef sat up straighter at the question, tilting her head in thought before she decided, "I…I don't really know," she hated to have to admit it.

Lena just raised a questioning eyebrow at Stef and waited for her to continue.

"I mean, I don't think so. The way they were talking, it didn't seem like it. But the conversation ended pretty quickly…I could tell Callie was shutting down and I didn't want to push with a bunch of questions," Stef explained, "I didn't want her to associate sharing with feeling uncomfortable."

Lena nodded in understanding. She was glad that Stef understood Callie so well. Truthfully, Lena was a bit surprised to hear that Callie had even shared unprompted in the first place. It was a wonderful step – it was just hard to feel happy about it when she was hearing such a terrible thing. She wished she'd known earlier, she would have given Callie an extra long goodnight hug before she'd gone to bed.

Stef squeezed Lena's hand once more before letting go of it and moving backwards on the bed, climbing under the covers. "We could probably just ask Jude, he would probably just answer," she offered casually.

"Probably," Lena agreed non-committedly, getting up and turning off the light before she got under the covers too. They _could _ask Jude but they probably wouldn't. Instead, they would wait for either Callie or Jude to come to them because, as much as they wanted, no needed, to know the facts about the things that had happened to their children, this wasn't about their needs, it was about their children's need to share the burden, which would only work if they were allowed to do it in their own time. As hard as it was, Lena and Stef would just have to be patient. In the meantime, all they could really do was offer Callie and Jude as much love as possible.

xxxxxx

Even later that same night, once everyone else had long since been asleep, Jude tiptoed into Callie and Mariana's room.

Callie was a light sleeper, she hadn't always been, but years of necessity had turned her into one. She was particularly attuned to Jude, similar to the way a mother was attuned to her baby's cries, and, so, within seconds of him stopping at the side of her bed, her eyes flew open.

She'd been dreaming about being locked in that closet and when she woke it was with flailing arms, one of them connecting with the wall. In the seconds that it took her to pull her arm away from the wall and remember that she was in her bed and not that cramped closet her heart raced wildly, thumping loudly in her chest. As she tried to calm her breathing, her gaze fell on Jude, her eyes raking him up and down until she was satisfied that there didn't seem to be anything physically wrong with him.

"Hi baby," Callie whispered as her gaze drifted past him to Mariana's bed, wondering if the noise her arm had made when it hit the wall had woken her, but the other girl still seemed to be sleeping peacefully.

"Hi," Jude whispered back.

Her eyes back on Jude, Callie couldn't help but look him up and down again but she still couldn't see any sign that something was physically wrong. The logical part of her brain knew that, unlike in all of their previous foster homes, here, if there was actually something wrong with him, Jude would have woken Stef and Lena up, not her, but still she couldn't help but worry. Her eyes were soft as she asked him, "Baby, what's wrong?"

Jude looked down at the ground as he mumbled quietly, "I had a bad dream."

She shouldn't be surprised, over the years he'd certainly had his share of nightmares, but this was the first time he'd woken her up in the middle of the night since they'd come to live here and his admission caught her off guard. A small part of her wondered why he'd come to her and not to Stef and Lena but she just moved over, making room for him in the bed, and pulling the covers back so that he could get in.

Callie didn't have to say anything to him, Jude immediately climbed in beside her, shifting his body so that he was as close to her as physically possible, her arm wrapping around him and his head falling onto her chest, the whole process coming back as second nature, a once practiced motion. He sighed softly, nestling even closer to her, happy to find that he still fit here next to her – it had been so long since they'd lain like this that he hadn't been sure he would.

Callie smoothed Jude's hair before resting her chin on the top of his head, murmuring softly to him, "Tell me about your dream." Callie knew that Jude wasn't like her, he liked to talk things through out loud, telling her about his dream would make him feel better.

It was true, Jude wasn't like Callie, it wasn't hard for him to share, least of all with her, so the words fell from his lips without hesitation. "It was about Bruce".

"Mmm…" Callie hummed wordlessly in understanding, rubbing Jude's arm soothingly. Bruce was the foster father who had broken her arm, definitely one of their worst placements. It seemed strange that Jude had dreamt of him tonight though. Callie wondered if her bringing up a previous foster home, even if it hadn't been the one he'd dreamt of, was what had caused the memory to surface. The possibility that she was to blame for his nightmare made her feel terrible. She sighed, "Real or fake?" The familiar question slipped from her lips, her way of asking him if what he'd dreamt was something that had actually happened.

"Real," Jude answered, his voice muffled as he buried his head further in her shirt.

"Did it scare you?" Callie asked him next, continuing to rub his arm as she glanced cautiously over in Mariana's direction, worried that their quiet conversation would wake her up – she still seemed to be sound asleep though, not having moved since Jude came into the room.

"He broke your arm. It _was_ scary," Jude told her, both his tone and his words indicating that it wasn't exactly the dream that had scared him, more the memory itself. As far as he was concerned, actually being there had been much scarier than any dream could ever be. Callie never screamed but she had that night, a pain filled cry that had made Jude wonder if maybe she was dying – it was that scream that had permeated through his dream tonight, that had turned it into a nightmare.

Callie sighed, "I'm sorry buddy." Her words were heartfelt and remorseful.

"Why?" Jude asked, genuinely confused by the apology.

Callie reached up and ran her fingers through the side of his hair, not knowing how to really answer the question. She was sorry for so many things – that his nightmares were real, that, despite her best attempts, she hadn't always been able to keep him safe, that he hadn't gotten to have a normal childhood. Right now though, the thing she was most sorry about was that her actions might have triggered his nightmare.

When Callie said nothing, Jude prompted again, "Why, Callie?" He knew she blamed herself for all kinds of things that weren't her fault and he hated it.

Callie would have rather said nothing but Jude was using what she called his determined voice, making it hard to not give in – she'd never been good at denying him the things he wanted. "I'm sorry that you had a nightmare," she whispered, half of the truth. "I hate when you have nightmares."

Jude was still sort of confused, although he knew then, at least, that his guess had been right – she was blaming herself for things that couldn't possibly be her fault. "You didn't cause it."

Callie didn't protest but she didn't say anything either and Jude was pretty sure that meant that she didn't really believe him. He wanted to convince her but he knew her enough to know that nothing he could say would really change her mind, not when it came to stuff like this. He changed tactics, "Callie?" he asked softly.

"Ya, buddy?" She responded.

"Thanks for keeping our deal. For talking about the closet today," Jude told her.

Callie ran her fingers through his hair again, lifting her chin so that she could kiss the top of his head, but still not saying anything.

"I was glad," Jude added and he really meant it. Callie feeling secure enough here to share her secrets made him feel safe. He would never admit this to her, but sometimes he still worried that he would wake up one morning and she would be gone again. The definitive knowledge that she trusted and loved the people in this house enough to share her secrets made him worry less.

"Mmm…" Callie hummed, finally acknowledged his words, as her chin settled back on the top of his head. "Jude…" she murmured several moments later, her voice exceptionally soft "…you know you can go to Stef and Lena when you have nightmares, right?" Her tone suggested that she was truly worried that he didn't.

"I know," Jude confirmed immediately, no doubt in his voice. He_ did_ know and maybe on a different night he would have gone to them but tonight he'd just wanted Callie. He wanted Callie to know that just because they were safe now, that just because he didn't need her to protect him anymore, it didn't mean that he didn't still need her.

Jude was silent for a long while after that, the sound of Callie's heart beat humming in his ear comfortingly, reminding him of the many nights he'd spent just like this, nestled against her side, the only place he'd really felt safe at times. When his eyelids started to feel heavy he whispered, "Can I stay here with you tonight?"

Callie's eyes drifted in Mariana's direction but she doubted the other girl would mind, besides, it didn't really matter anyway, she could never deny Jude this particular request. "Always, baby, always."

"I love you Callie," Jude told her then, his eyes already closing, the steady beating of Callie's heart still thumping in his ear like his very own lullaby.

"I love you too baby," Callie murmured back. She didn't let herself close her own eyes until Jude's breathing changed, indicating that he had drifted off to sleep.

The next morning when Mariana woke up to both of her soon to be siblings sound asleep in Callie's bed, she didn't say a word, just smiled softly at the sight, and tiptoed out of the room and down to the kitchen.

xxxxxx

Days later, on a Saturday afternoon, Callie was helping Brandon and Jesus clean out, or at least make space, in Brandon's room – where Jesus would be staying temporarily until Brandon decided to come home.

Being around Brandon still felt strange and when she'd first come into the room, offering to help, they'd danced around each other uncomfortably but right now Callie was relaxed. She was having a good time pulling stuff out of Brandon's closet and making the boys reveal what particular items were or why they had been kept, teasing Brandon good naturedly about some of her stranger finds – like the leaf collection. The latest item she pulled out was some kind of toy. She held it up for both of the boys to see. "Why do you still have toys Brandon?"

"Oh man, it's Optimus!" Jesus grinned widely, excited by this particular find. "Can I keep that?" The question was directed at Brandon.

Brandon immediately shook his head at Jesus, "No way."

"Aw come on," Jesus frowned at him, hoping that his best sad face would cause Brandon to cave in – it had usually worked when he was younger and wanted to play with Brandon's toys.

Brandon just shook his head again. "Sorry, it's just not going to happen, Optimus and me go way back." He grinned over at Jesus.

Callie was confused. _Where they being serious?_ "Guys…you realize you're fighting over a _toy_ right? For kids?"

"A _toy_? You think that's a toy?" Brandon's eyes widened in mock horror at her words. He turned his head in Jesus' direction, whispering loudly to him, "She thinks it's a toy."

Jesus suppressed a smile as he shook his head at Brandon, "She's _crazy_." He emphasized the word crazy.

Brandon grinned over at Callie, reaching over and grabbing the transformer from her hand, his voice calm and serious as he announced to her, "This is not a toy, it's an action figure."

"An action figure?" Callie couldn't help the way her face contorted in a way that suggested that she thought they were the crazy ones.

"Yes, an action figure," Jesus nodded, throwing his support behind Brandon, his voice just as serious as his brother's.

"Ya, okay, guys," Callie couldn't help but laugh at them. "But, come on, action figure is just a code word for _toy_."

Jesus groaned in pretend disbelief, slapping his hand to his forehead.

Brandon shook his head. "I'm disappointed in you Callie," he told her seriously.

"Me? You're the one fighting over a toy," she laughed louder, enjoying herself – this, the teasing, felt like real sibling stuff.

"You know, I think I'm tired of you making fun of all the stuff we keep finding. What do you think Jesus?" Brandon's eyes twinkled as he glanced over at Jesus.

"I think you make a very good point Brandon," Jesus agreed conspiratorially, his head tilting subtly in the direction of the closet.

Brandon nodded his head, confirming that they had the same idea. "Don't worry," he declared, "I know how to make her stop," He grinned, taking two steps forward and grabbing one of her arms, while Jesus simultaneously grabbed the other one, easily lifting Callie off the ground.

Callie was still laughing as she shrieked, "What are you doing? Guys? Stop!"

As they backed her into the closet her laughter died, the tone of her voice changing from amusement to something closer to fear, her last shout of "Stop!" coming out much louder, but through their own laughter the boys didn't notice the change.

Once they'd deposited her in the closet, Brandon quickly closed the door, keeping his hand on the handle so that she wouldn't be able to open it. Leaning casually against the door he joked loudly, his eyes on Jesus, "Ahh…that's better."

"Much better," Jesus jokingly agreed, just as loudly to ensure that Callie would hear him.

From inside the closet, Callie banged her fist against the wooden door. "Brandon! Let me out!"

"Do you hear something Jesus?" Brandon continued to joke.

"No, I don't think I do," Jesus followed.

"Please…" Callie whimpered.

Brandon frowned at the closet door then, something about the desperation behind Callie's last word making his stomach turn. Suddenly concerned, he was about to open the door when Jude came barrelling into the room, Mariana two steps behind him. The pair had been next door working on Jude's math homework when they'd heard Callie's scream.

"Let her out," Jude growled, as he practically tackled Brandon out of the way – or at least tried to, he wasn't exactly successful given their size difference.

"Whoa, buddy," Brandon steadied him, keeping him from falling over.

"We're just playing," Jesus added, wondering what had the younger boy so freaked out. He looked over at Mariana, wondering if she would know what was going on. He was surprised to find that his twin was taking in the whole seen with wide horrified eyes. He didn't understand why, she'd once locked him in a closet with Brandon's help and nobody seemed to mind _that_.

"Moms!" Mariana shrieked urgently, hoping that they'd hear her and come quickly.

Stef and Lena had already been on their way up the stairs, having heard all the noise coming from the second floor, but at Mariana's shriek they doubled their pace, stopping in the doorway to Brandon's room just as Jude's shaking hand managed to pull the closet door open.

On the other side of the door, Callie was standing motionless, her eyes wide, her face an ashen colour, and her breathing coming in strange puffs, her nostrils flared.

"Callie?" Jude and Brandon called simultaneously, concerned.

Jesus, on the other hand, couldn't find his voice, the look on his soon to be sister's face making his stomach twist in a painful knot. Something was really wrong and, whatever it was, he knew immediately that it was because he and Brandon had put her in that closet. He gulped.

Callie stood unmoving, blinking rapidly, for several moments before she seemed to get a hold of herself. She didn't say a word, she just bolted, pushing first past Jude and Brandon and then past Stef and Lena.

Stef and Lena shared a look for only a split second – Lena mouthing the word "go," and Stef immediately taking off in pursuit of Callie, without a second glance back into Brandon's room.

With Stef headed after Callie, Lena set her sights on the remaining occupants of the room. Jude looked like he was in shock, his crestfallen face making Lena's heart hurt. She started to walk towards him but Mariana got there first.

Wrapping her arm around Jude, Mariana pulled him closer to her, hugging him with all her might as she glanced up at her mother, "Go, I've got him." She figured Callie could probably use both parents right now.

"I…" Lena wanted to protest but she didn't know what to say. She was torn between wanting to be with Callie and wanting to stay here and comfort Jude. There was also the matter of needing to talk to Jesus and Brandon, who both looked incredibly confused on top of their obvious concern.

Seeming to sense her indecision, Jude startled Lena as he asked softly, "Can you please go make sure Callie is okay? She's probably scared." He wanted to go too but he thought it would be better if he didn't. He was hoping that Callie would tell Stef and Lena the stuff she wouldn't tell him, the stuff she thought she was protecting him from, like how much the closet scared her.

"Okay, sweetheart," Lena nodded slowly, walking closer to Jude and Mariana, running her hand over Jude's cheek and leaning in to place a kiss on his forehead. "Don't worry, it will be okay," she comforted him softly, glad when she saw his nod of agreement.

After that, Lena kissed Mariana's cheek, murmuring, "thank you," to her daughter, incredibly proud of the way she had immediately gone to comfort Jude.

Lena turned her eyes on Jesus and Brandon next, "I will be back to talk to you," she told them, before finally leaving the room in search of her wife and eldest daughter.

Once their mother had left, Mariana tilted her head in her brothers' direction and informed them, "You guys are idiots."

The glare Jude shot his brothers confirmed that he shared her opinion.

Jesus would usually protest, but he just ignored the insult. The truth was, right now he did sort of feel like an idiot. He was still confused too though, so he asked, "What just happened?" Hoping someone in the room would clue him in – he hated not knowing what was going on.

Mariana glanced down at Jude, waiting for his nod of approval before she would say anything. Squeezing the boys shoulder gently, she turned her eyes back to her brothers. "What just happened is that you just locked somebody who's scared of closets in a freaking closet." Mariana knew it wasn't _really_ her brothers' fault, they hadn't known, so she softened her voice considerably as she revealed, "One of Callie's foster mother's used to lock her in a closet, like all of the time."

Brandon's face paled considerably at Mariana's words, his eyes drifting to the closet he had placed Callie in, wondering what kind of terrible memory he'd caused her to relive.

Mariana thought he looked like somebody had kicked him.

Jesus didn't look much better. "Oh," was the only horrified word he could manage.

_Oh_ was about right.

xxxxxx

Even though Stef had left the room only seconds after Callie, she didn't catch up with the girl until she finally stopped running in the middle of the backyard.

Stef slowly approached Callie, who was standing perfectly still. "Callie?" She called softly.

Callie didn't turn around or move and at first Stef didn't think she'd heard her but then quiet words left the girl's mouth between shaky breaths. "I just needed air."

"Of course you did, baby," Stef hummed sympathetically, moving even closer to Callie so that they were now standing side by side, their arms touching. "Of course you did."

Callie didn't move away from Stef, she didn't move closer either though, she just continued to stand perfectly still, trying, unsuccessfully, to push memories of being locked in a closet out of her mind as her heart hammered wildly in her chest.

Stef noticed that Callie's breathing was still heavy – although whether that was from having been in the closet or from the running she'd done, Stef wasn't sure. Slowly she placed her hand on Callie's back, "sshh, just breathe, you're okay," she murmured, her eyes on the girl's ashen face as she rubbed soothing circles, waiting for her breathing to slow.

They stood there in silence, with the exception of Stef's occasional soft murmurings, until the back door opened and they both turned around to see who was coming to join them.

Stef still had her hand on Callie's back and she felt her sigh in what seemed to be relief at the sight of Lena. The reaction made her wonder who Callie hadn't wanted to see. _Maybe the people who'd put her in the closet? _At the thought, she felt a sudden flare of anger and she realized that she wanted so badly to yell at her eldest sons, even though, logically, she knew they hadn't meant any harm.

"Hi," Lena called softly to the two of them, stopping in front of Callie, her hand immediately reaching out to the girl, rubbing her arm comfortingly. "Are you okay honey?"

Callie said nothing. For reasons that she didn't really understand, the question caused tears to suddenly fill her eyes, threatening to spill over. _Why wasn't she okay? Why did she have to be so upset about this anyway?_

Lena shot Stef a quick look before questioning Callie softly again, "Sweetheart?" her voice was laced with concern.

Callie looked down at the ground, willing the tears to go away, wondering once more why she was so upset. _It was just a stupid closet, it wasn't worth crying over._ She nudged the grass with her foot, suddenly realizing that she was in her socks, not having stopped to put shoes on as she bolted out of the house. Knowing that Lena was waiting for an answer, eventually she shrugged one shoulder slowly, still not saying anything or removing her focus from the ground.

Lena knew that the shoulder shrug was Callie speak for _no_ and she sighed quietly. "Honey, why don't we go sit down, huh?" All she really wanted to do was pull Callie into a hug and maybe never let go again.

Callie looked up slowly then, glancing between Stef and Lena, before biting her lip and shrugging both shoulders this time – Callie speak for _I guess_.

Stef placed her hands on Callie's shoulders and Lena grabbed one of her hands as they both guided her over to take a seat at the bench under the covered patio, essentially forcing her to sit between the two of them.

Once seated, Stef reached up and brushed some of Callie's wavy hair out of her face. The girl's skin was still much paler than usual and Stef didn't like that one bit.

Lena squeezed the hand she was still holding. "Were you scared sweetheart?" She asked softly.

_Yes._ The answer immediately entered Callie's head but she didn't say it out loud – she hated admitting to being scared. She closed her eyes but immediately blinked them back open, the flash of darkness too reminiscent of the darkness in the closet.

Stef's heart broke watching as Callie seemed to struggle. "Please talk to us baby," she whispered.

"We're right here, we're listening," Lena murmured her agreement as she squeezed Callie's hand again.

Callie remained silent for several moments, her wide eyes staring off into the distance, before she mumbled, "I don't like closets."

Stef almost laughed, she might have if Callie didn't look so broken. She shared a look with Lena across the top of Callie's head before she said, "We kind of already knew that sweets."

"I know," Callie sighed. She wasn't sure exactly what they wanted her to tell them – they already knew that one of her previous foster mother's had locked her in a closet. _What else was there to say?_ _Did they want her to tell them how terrible it was? Wasn't that obvious? _She just wasn't good at this, at sharing. She was surprised though when she realized that she didn't want to say nothing, that she _did_ want to talk to them. It was strange feeling for her. Finally she gave up on trying to figure out what to say, "Can you…will you just ask me?"

Lena frowned, not really following Callie's train of thought. "Ask you what sweetheart?"

Callie shrugged, looking down at her feet. "Anything…whatever you want. I…I don't know how to…I don't know what to say about it," she admitted quietly.

Lena shared another look with Stef, tears glistening in her eyes as she finally understood what Callie was telling her, that she had no clue how to share. The realization that Callie had been so alone for so long that he didn't even know how to express her thoughts hurt Lena's heart nearly as much as any confession about her past ever could.

Stef, equally as upset as Lena, was the first to find her voice. Running her hand over the top of Callie's head and leaning over and kissing her temple before asking, "Okay, how about…how old were you when you lived with the woman who locked you in a closet?" She picked the most inconspicuous question she could think of, although she had to grit her teeth to get the last part out without expressing any anger.

Callie blinked surprised – she hadn't expected the question to be so easy to answer. "Eleven."

Stef bit her lip to keep herself from sighing. She didn't really know why she had hoped Callie had been older when it happened, it wouldn't have made it any less horrific. She just didn't like picturing Callie being younger than Jude was now. She hated knowing just how much of her daughter's childhood had been stolen.

Lena followed Stef's question with one of her own, trying to push the image of Callie, practically still a baby, locked in a closet out of her mind. "How long did you live there?"

"Ten months," Callie answered immediately, relaxing a bit when the second question was equally as easy to answer as the first.

Lena closed her eyes, sucking in a deep breath as she followed up with another question. "How often did it happen?" Ten months was a really long time and she almost didn't want to hear this answer.

"Umm…lots," Callie bit her lip, the question was harder but not too difficult for her to answer. She paused as she tried to come up with an actually number, finally settling for, "once a week, at least." It had usually been more but not always.

Stef had to stop herself from doing the math in her head. She didn't need to know the exact number. Once had been once too much as far as she was concerned, so the frequency that Callie was suggesting was beyond horrifying for her to hear. "Oh baby," she murmured, her voice sounded pained, as she leaned over to kiss Callie once more, happy when Callie seemed to lean into the comfort she was offering.

Moments later, Stef thought of another question. She almost hesitated to ask it but she really did want to know the answer and she knew that Lena did too. "What about Jude?" Her words were quiet.

Callie scrunched up her forehead in confusion, not really understanding Stef's question at first. As realization suddenly dawned on her she shook her head vehemently, "nnn..no," she stuttered out, her eyes widening. "I wouldn't…I would _never_ let that happen." It was sort of the truth. She would have tried her absolute best to keep Jude safe but, as she'd learned in other foster homes, that wasn't always possible. Luckily in this one she hadn't even had to try, he had been safe there.

"Hey, hey, sshh, it's okay," Lena calmed, her voice soothing, as she rubbed circles on the back of Callie's hand, reaching up to brush her hand across Callie's cheek.

Stef wanted to shout at Lena that '_no it certainly was not okay'_ but she calmed herself before she murmured to Callie, "Love, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you, we _know_ you took good care of Jude." And they did know that – anyone just had to look at Jude to know that that was the truth. "But, Callie, baby," she continued, "you were eleven years old and…look at me a second…" Her next words were important and she waited for Callie's gaze to meet hers to murmur, "You were a child, you _are_ a child, and it wasn't your job to keep Jude safe. You shouldn't have had to. Not then and not in any of your other foster homes."

Callie sighed, she had no clue how to even go about trying to process what Stef had just told her. As far as she was concerned, it didn't matter that she'd been, as Stef had put it, a child, of course it had been her job to keep Jude safe, no one else was going to do it. Instead of saying that though, she explained, "I didn't have to keep him safe there. She liked him. She was nice to him even. He _was_ safe."

Stef sighed too – Callie seemed to have completely missed the point of what she'd said. Convincing her was something they were just going to have to work on later though because she was pretty sure that was going to take some time and right now she wanted to address what Callie had just said, or more, what Callie hadn't said.

Lena heard what Callie hadn't said as well and she shared a concerned look with Stef before she was the one to speak up. "Callie, sweetheart, just because that woman was nice to Jude, it didn't excuse what she did to you. It didn't make it okay." It took all of her control to keep venom from dripping from the words, _that woman_.

"I know that," Callie frowned at Lena's words.

"Do you really, love?" Stef questioned softly, honestly wondering if she did, fairly certain that she didn't.

Callie shrugged, glancing down towards her feet again. She wasn't going to right out admit anything. The truth was though that she'd spent a lot of time wondering what exactly had been wrong with her. She'd spent a lot of time wondering what had made her foster mother hate her so much when she'd liked Jude just fine. The truth was also that she'd felt incredibly relieved but also incredibly guilty when Bill had moved them out of that home – Jude had been safe there but he hadn't been safe in most of their next homes.

Stef hated the way Callie shrugged, the way her eyes seemed to be filled with nothing but sorrow. Her next words were firm, her voice filled with love. "Callie, listen to me. _You_ are just as likeable as Jude, _you _are just as important, and _you_ deserve to be safe just as much as he does."

Callie wasn't sure if she hated or loved that Stef could see right through her – she was leaning towards hate but there wasn't much she could do about it. She sighed again, suddenly exhausted, pulling her hand out of Lena's and leaning forward so that she could rest her head in her hands.

"It's the truth Callie," Lena told her, reinforcing Stef's words as she reached over and rubbed her now free hand across Callie's back, tracing aimless circles. After a few moments, she whispered softly to her, "We don't have to keep talking anymore if you don't want to." She knew Callie had a limit and she imagined they must be reaching it. She wanted Callie to know that they would always respect that limit.

Stef still had a half a million questions that she really wanted answered but she had to agree with Lena, Callie looked exhausted and maybe overwhelmed too. "Mama's right, we can stop now," she murmured, running her hand through Callie's hair, casually. "We really just need to know one more thing…" Lena looked over at her inquisitively and Stef winked at her wife before continuing "…should we ground Brandon and Jesus for one or two year?"

Callie immediately raised her head out of her hands and looked strangely over at Stef.

"I'm kidding, love," Stef shook her head, laughing lightly at the look on Callie's face, although she was a small bit concerned that Callie hadn't picked up right away that it had been a joke.

Callie knew that Stef's was kidding about the duration but she wasn't sure she was kidding about the whole thing. "You're not going to actually ground them are you?" She asked quietly. As much as she wished they hadn't put her in the closet, she knew they would never have done it if they'd known how much it would scare her. "It wasn't their fault…they didn't know it would…scare me so much." She bit her lip at the admission that she'd been scared.

Stef tried to hide her surprise when Callie admitted to being scared. Obviously she'd known that Callie had been scared, it was clear as day, but Callie wouldn't usually admit something like that – she'd completely evaded the question when Lena had asked it earlier. Based on the look on Lena's face, Stef guessed her wife was just as surprised and not succeeding particularly well in hiding it either.

Stef grabbed one of Callie's hands, bringing it to her lips and kissing it. She wasn't sure what they were going to do about the boys but if Callie really didn't want them to ground them, than she supposed they wouldn't. She looked at Lena who nodded her head ever so slightly, giving Stef the go ahead to shrug and proclaim, "Nah, we won't ground them."

"Good," Callie nodded as she offered Stef a small smile.

Stef smiled back, feeling her heart swell with love. "Oh Callie, do you even have any idea just how much we love you?" She couldn't hold back any longer, reaching forward and pulling Callie into a hug.

A split second later, Lena wrapped her arms around Callie as well, murmuring into the girl's hair, "Trust me, it's more than you could possibly ever know."

Callie closed her eyes then, pushing away the memory of that terrible closet and that terrible time in her life, and soaking up all of the love she was being offered.

The trio staid wrapped in each other's arms for several minutes before they slowly untangled themselves and got up.

As she stretched, Lena's eyes drifted towards the house, not really surprised at what she saw. "I think we have an audience," she motioned towards the kitchen window, where four heads were clearly visible.

Stef snorted, amused by the sight, although she glanced nervously at Callie wondering what her reaction would be. Callie seemed mostly unbothered though, so Stef suggested casually, "I think the monsters want to come out to play. Should we let them?"

Callie just nodded slowly. Those _monsters_ were her siblings and even though a part of her was highly embarrassed and would rather avoid them until they forgot all about what had happened upstairs, she knew that that wasn't really possible. So, she figured she may as well just get it over with.

At Callie's agreement, Stef motioned to her children in the window, indicating that it was okay for them to come outside.

Jude was the first to make it to Callie, slamming into his sister with so much force that he nearly knocked her over.

"Nice to see you too buddy," Callie laughed, hugging him back.

"You're okay?" He mumbled into her shirt, clinging tighter.

"Mmhm," she confirmed, kissing the top of his head and whispering into his hair, "How about you?"

"Mmhm," Jude's response mimicked hers.

He held on a moment longer before pulling back and letting Mariana take his place. Her hug was a lot shorter but it came with a smirked, "Don't worry, I gave them hell," which made Callie laugh.

Brandon moved towards her next, stopping just shy of touching distance in front of her, and sliding his hands into his pockets. He searched her face for a long moment before offering a quiet, remorseful, and sincere, "I'm sorry." He didn't attempt to hug her, even though he wanted to, he didn't want to make things awkward.

Callie offered him a lopsided a smile, "I know."

Jesus was much more hesitant to approach and it wasn't until Stef shoved his shoulder, murmuring, "She doesn't bite," that he shuffled closer to Callie.

Jesus stopped beside Brandon, rocking on the balls of his feet as he raised his eyes to meet Callie's gaze. "I'm…uh…sorry. Like, you don't even know how sorry," he rushed out, "Like really really really really…"

"Jesus stop," Callie cut him off. "It's okay, _really_." She smiled slowly at him, running her hand through her hair, "Just…umm…don't put me in anymore closets, okay?"

The grin that Jesus gave her then was contagious. "You definitely don't have to worry about _that_." He rocked on his feet again, tilting his head. "But…uh…you're going to have to, like, tell me if there's other stuff I'm not supposed to do because I don't want to be responsible for _that_ again." He glanced over his shoulder at Stef and Lena before looking back at Callie, stage whispering, "Moms would kill me."

Even though Jesus was asking her for something she wasn't sure she could give him – she was still working on this whole sharing thing – Callie couldn't help the laugh that escaped her lips. "Don't worry, I won't let them," she told him.

"This is why you are officially my favourite," Jesus declared.

"Hey…" Mariana jokingly protested from beside Callie, "I'm your twin, _I'm_ supposed to be your favourite."

Jesus shrugged one shoulder at her, "Sorry?" He said, not sounding particular apologetic.

Mariana just feigned an unimpressed look.

At her look, Jesus bounded forward, wrapping his arms around her and squeezing tighter than necessary, spinning her around once. "Come on Mariana, you know I love _all_ of my siblings."

Mariana snorted, suppressing a laugh as she told him, "If I say okay will you let me go?"

"Uh-uh," Jesus shook his head, although he did loosen his hold, unwrapping one of his arms from her, leaving the other draped around her shoulder. "Then you'd miss out on the awesome group hug."

"Group hug?" Jude was the one to ask confused. "What group hug?"

"The one we're having right now," Jesus answered as if it were clear as day. When no one said anything or moved he added, "Well? What are you all waiting for?"

Everyone laughed then.

Through the laughter, Stef shared a long look with Callie. Callie just shrugged at her, grinning as she grabbed Jude's hand, pulling him with her closer to Jesus and Mariana. Stef and Lena, and then Brandon followed her lead and within moments Callie had become the center of a Foster family group hug.


End file.
